Is Hell Endothermic or Exothermic?

i did not know how to react to this joke

Dr. Schlambaugh, a senior lecturer at the Chemical Engineering Department, University of Oklahoma, is known for posing questions on final exams like: "Why do airplanes fly?"

In May a few years ago, the "Momentum, Heat and Mass Transfer " exam paper contained the question: "Is Hell exothermic or endothermic? Support your answer with proof." Most students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law or similar. One student, however, wrote the following:

First, we must postulate that if souls exist, they must have some mass. If they do, then a mole of souls also must have a mass. So, at what rate are souls moving into hell and at what rate are souls leaving? I think we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it does not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for souls entering Hell, let's look at the different religions that exist in the world today. Some religions say that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there are more than one of these religions, and people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all people and all souls go to Hell.

With the birth and death rates what they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change in the volume of Hell. Boyle's Law states that inorder for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the ratio of the mass of the souls and volume needs to stay constant.

[Answer 1] So, if Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose.
[Answer 2] Of course, if Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase in souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over. So which is it?
If we accept the postulate (given to me byTeresa Banyan during freshman year) that "it'll be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you", and taking into account that I still have not succeeded in having sexual relations with her, then [Answer 2] cannot be correct; ...... thus, Hell is exothermic.

The student got the only A.

Childrens books you will never see

i love these jokes

1. "Strangers Have the Best Candy"

2. "You Were an Accident"

3. "The Little Sissy Who Snitched"

4. "Some Kittens CanFly!"

5. "Getting More Chocolate on Your Face"

6. "WhereWould You Like to Be Buried?"

7. "Kathy Was So Bad Her MomStopped Loving Her"

8. "The Attention Deficit DisorderAssociation's Book of Wild Animals of North Amer- Hey!Let's Go Ride Our Bikes!"

9. "All Dogs Go to Hell"

10."TheKids' Guide to Hitchhiking"

11."When Mommy and Daddy Don'tKnow the Answer They Say God Did It"

12. "Garfield GetsFeline Leukemia" 13. "What Is That Dog Doing to That OtherDog?"

14. "Why Can't Mr. Fork and Ms. Electrical Outlet BeFriends?"

15. "Bi-Curious George"

16. "Daddy Drinks BecauseYou Cry"

17. "Mister Policeman Eats His Service Revolver"

18. "You Are Different and That's Bad"

19. "Dad's New WifeTimothy"

20. "Pop! Goes The Hamster....And Other GreatMicrowave Games"

21. "Testing Homemade Parachutes WithNothing At All But Your Household Pets"

22. "TheHardy Boys, the Barbie Twins, and the Vice Squad"

23. "TheTickling Babysitter"

24. "Babar Meets the Taxidermist"

25."Curious George and the High-Voltage Fence"

26. "The Boy WhoDied from Eating All His Vegetables"

27. "Start a Real-EstateEmpire With the Change From Your Mom's Purse"

28."The Pop-up Book of Human Anatomy"

29. "Things Rich KidsHave, But You Never Will"

30. "The Care Bears Maul SomeCampers and are Shot Dead"

31. "How to Become The DominantMilitary Power In Your Elementary School"

32."Controlling the playground: Respect through Fear"

Top Ten Ways The Wizard of Oz Would Be Different If It Were Made Today

10. Grizzly scene in which Dorothy blasts flying monkeys out of the sky with an uzi

9. "Katie bar the door! There's a giant asteroid headed straight for Oz!"

8. Dorothy steps outside and says, "Like, this is so not Kansas!"

7. Instead of "oil," tin man moans, "Viagra."

6. Kathie Lee Gifford plays Dorothy -- audience roots for witch

5. It would be named "Twister II"

4. To prepare for his role as the Scarecrow, DeNiro would actually have his brain removed

3. Lovable dog Toto replaced by lovable droid T.O.T.O.

2. "Lions and tigers and bears, oh fu**!"

1. New title -- "Wiz Got Game"

computer male or female?

this one is just great

As you are aware, ships have long been characterized as being female (e.g., "Steady as she goes", or "She's listing to starboard, Captain!").

Recently, a group of computer scientists (all males) announced that computers should also be referred to as being female. Their reasons for drawing this conclusion follow:

Five reasons to believe computers are female:

1. No one but the Creator understands their internal logic.

2. The native language they use to communicate with other computers is incomprehensible to everyone else.

3. The message "Bad command or file name" is about as informative as, "If you don't know why I'm mad at you, then I'm certainly not going to tell you".

4. Even your smallest mistakes are stored in long-term memory for later retrieval.

5. As soon as you make a commitment to one, you find yourself spending half your paycheck on accessories for it.

However, another group of computer scientists (all female) think that computers should be referred to as if they were male. Their reasons follow:

Five reasons to believe computers are male:

1. They have a lot of data, but are still clueless.

2. They are supposed to help you solve problems, but half the time they are the problem.

3. As soon as you commit to one you realize that, if you had waited a little longer, you could have obtained a better model.

4. In order to get their attention, you have to turn them on.

5. Big power surges knock them out for the rest of the night.

best t-shirts of the summer

this is quite funny

1. (around a picture of dandelions) I Fought the Lawn andthe Lawn Won

2. So Few Men, So Few Who Can Afford Me

3. I Suffer Occasional Delusions of Adequacy

4. God Made Us Sisters, Prozac Made Us Friends

5. If They Don't Have Chocolate In Heaven, I Ain't Going

6. At My Age, I've Seen It All, Done It All, Heard It All...I Just Can't Remember It All

7. My Mother Is A Travel Agent For Guilt Trips

8. I Just Do What The Voices Inside My Head Tell Me To Do

9. (Worn by a pregnant woman) A Man Did This To Me, Oprah

10. If It's Called Tourist Season, Why Can't We Hunt Them?

11. Senior Citizen: Give Me My Damn Discount

12. Princess, Having Had Sufficient Experience With Princes,Seeks Frog

13. No, It Doesn't Hurt (on a "well-tattooed gentleman")

14. (on the back of a passing motorcyclist) If You Can ReadThis, My Wife Fell Off

15. I Used To Be Schizophrenic, But We're OK Now

16. (Over the outline of the state of Minnesota) My GovernorCan Beat Up Your Governor

17. Veni, Vedi, Visa: I came. I Saw. I Did a LittleShopping.

18. What If The Hokey Pokey Is Really What It's All About

19. I Didn't Climb to the Top of the Food Chain to Be aVegetarian

20. (on the Front) Yale Is Just One Big Party (on the back)With a $25,000 Cover Charge

21. Coffee, Chocolate, Men...Some Things Are Just BetterRich

22. Liberal Arts Major...Will Think For Money

23. Growing Old is Inevitable; Growing Up is Optional

24. IRS-Be Audit You Can Be

25. Gravity...It's Not Just a Good Idea. It's the Law.

26. If You Want Breakfast In Bed, Sleep In the Kitchen

27. Wanted: Meaningful Overnight Relationship

28. The Old Pro...Often Wrong...Never In Doubt

29. If At First You Don't Succeed, Skydiving Isn't For You

30. Old Age Comes at a Bad Time

31. In America, Anyone Can Be President. That's One of the Risks You Take.

32. First Things First, but Not Necessarily in That Order.